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Archive for September, 2010

Adult Play

Tuesday, September 21st, 2010

On the child within the adult: “It takes a very long time to become young.”

– Pablo Picasso

On music: “I never practice. I always play.” –Wanda Landowska.

A raise of hands, who sees the words “adult play” and thinks, “that’s not appropriate for a respectable blog” or “that’s an oxymoron”? I would assume you’re thinking nothing less. Usually, when we see the word “play” in close proximity to the word “adult” we think the worst, nothing about being a playful adult can be good, right?

Well, actually, according to Levy, in the text, Play Behavior, “Living in play means confirming our existence and celebrating life. . .Play brings out the greatness, dignity, and sacredness of our existence, which in turn gives impetus and meaning to our lives” (Levy, p. 1, 2).

“Yes, yes, yes, play is great for kids,” you’re probably thinking, “and that’s why I did it as a kid, I was celebrating life, my dolls gave my life meaning,  but why, Davida, are you bringing it up now, I’m an adult and have things to do!”

Well, here’s the thing, in his text, Joseph Levy explores play therapy as therapy for adults and in reading this old, 1978 text, all I could think was, “man, music therapy is such perfect play therapy for adults!” To get you on my page, let me ask you this question, what kind of “play” would an adult engage in to “celebrate life” or bring out “greatness, dignity, and sacredness of our existence”? Let’s see, there’s always board games, tag, dress-up, or duck duck goose. Is this the type of play we are talking about? Perhaps, but for many of us we look for more sophisticated structured play, as in sports, hiking, or meditation. This is where playing music finds a residence. Music is not only a structured, sophisticated form of play, but it can be social or individual. Additionally, it affects us both psychologically and physiologically, as it builds the elasticity and affects every part of the brain, balancing a bevy of neural chemicals as it trickles into our ear and resonates in our bellies.

In Play Behavior, the question is asked, “How do we confirm our existence and affirm our worth?” Many psychotherapy clients come to therapy with that question. And to that question, there is the answer, “By having an effect on our world.” In music, with every swing of the arm or hum of the voice, one is affecting his or her world. It’s immediate and immediately fulfilling. Just by hitting a drum, one takes action by first picking up the drum and hitting it, this affects himself through the rush of neural chemicals that flush the brain and affects the world by pushing all the molecules in the room into a dizzying spin.

Often, as adults, we suppress feelings out of the necessity of being an adult. And all too often, these feelings of stress, anger, or sadness, manifest somatically as headaches, heartburn, weight gain, or in worst case scenarios, heart-attack. According to Levy, play therapy provides an, “excellent arena for trying out combinations and permutations of individual traits that would not be tolerated and reinforced in the real world.” This can simply be those feelings that are not appropriate to express in the conference room, to your children, or your loved ones.

In the music therapy room, it is possible to act out anger, frustration, sadness, joy, or release, and nobody has to be the wiser. Additionally, it is an arena in which we are free to take risks, to risk playing the wrong rhythm, risk falling into the wrong beat, risk our current understanding of who we are and expand our concept of who we are becoming. Also, when we play music together and we find our entrained rhythm, we are given the opportunity to experience our best selves. We are able to be considerate, thoughtful, loving, honest, compassionate, empathic, and wise because it takes all of these traits to successfully create rhythm together.

When in therapy, we are often searching for that which will make us more self-aware, mindful, help us cope, give us reprieve. In music, we answer this search with the power of flow. It is something that all musicians know intimately and most people have experienced. We have all at one point or another fallen into a trance of love making to whatever it is we are doing, whether that be playing music, running, yoga, painting, or anything else. According to the play theorist, Csikszentmihalyi, “Play is the flow experience par excellence.” When we are in “flow” we give up our ego, we transcend our skin, our self-consciousness, and exist in the space between consciousness and prayer.

With regard to adults playing, Levy asks, “As adults, . .where are we to look for the same kind of temporary immunity, for the same brief but inviolable sanctuary we found perfectly adapted to our needs in those old  games of hide and seek?

Where indeed, but in playing music, itself? Once, while in music school, I was told, “make your song your sanctuary.” I loved this and the vision that created in my mind: of every sound made, throwing up walls with buttresses, giant stained glass windows, and steeples to temple my heart. This vision probably propelled me into music therapy and believing in the power of playing music. Music is a place of solace even if we have never played an instrument before because the sanctuary is built when we engage in the act of play. And to do that, takes no talent, no skill. It takes the willingness to play.

Levy, J. (1983). Play Behavior. Robert E. Krieger Publishing Company, Inc. Malabar Florida.

Davida Price, MS, MT-BC works in private practice providing psychotherapy and music therapy in San Diego, CA.

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Have a lovely, musical Day!

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When Playing Music Seems Like a Scary Thing To Do. . .

Monday, September 13th, 2010

Davida Price, MS

In my work, I run into lots of different kinds of people and I try to encourage them to engage in music. This is really hard. Why? Because most of us, even musical and artistic people, think something along the lines of this:  “Why would any level-headed, non-musician, non-hippie, middle-of-the-road adult come to a drum or music circle or engage in any kind of group music making?”

I saw it last night, I was providing a community music therapy circle at a local art gallery. I would beckon people (who were staring and smiling) to come join us and they would laugh and walk on, I wasn’t selling anything, I was inviting people to come play with instruments (later in the night I ended up calling them toys, this seemed less scary to outsiders). At work, many times, I run into people being so discomforted by the prospect of music making that they leave the room before I give any type of introduction, just seeing the instruments is so threatening that they feel it necessary to exit.

In fact, all of these things go through most people’s heads when faced with the prospect of playing music in a group (such as a drum circle):

  1. I’m going to embarrass myself.
  2. Playing music takes talent.
  3. I don’t have any rhythm.
  4. I’m not musical.
  5. I haven’t played an instrument since middle school.
  6. It’s going to be loud and chaotic.
  7. How is that going to help me?
  8. That’s for kids.
  9. I’m not in the mood.
  10. That looks like fun, but I could never do it, it’s not my thing, it’s way outside of my comfort zone!

See, so if you’re someone who has encountered a Community Music Circle of some kind, you are among most people who think these things. But, here’s the thing, these are all myths! “What?!! But that’s how I feel!” Yep, they’re all myths.

Don’t worry though, you’re not alone. Below, I’ve re-written the above thoughts with process questions that you are welcome to consider.

Debunking Adult Myths About Making Music and Facing our Cognitive Distortions about it:

  1. I’m going to embarrass myself. Okay, we’re talking about a community drum or music circle, right? Not a concert at the Metropolitan Opera House. So who is going to judge you besides yourself? Process: Consider why the possibility of embarrassing yourself is such a scary thing. Where did this come from? Who is going to judge you and why do you care?
  2. Playing music takes talent. No, it doesn’t. Being a professional musician takes about 10,000 hours of skill-building practice (According to Gladwell in Outliers), but not talent. Playing music for fun just takes listening, being gentle with oneself, and being willing to make mistakes and try again. Process: Where did you learn that you don’t have any musical talent? When was that thought planted into your mind? Why do you believe it?
  3. I don’t have any rhythm. Right, you’ve never tapped your foot, clapped your hands at a football game, walked, run, jumped rope, or sung Happy Birthday. If you have a heartbeat, you have rhythm. Perhaps you have not used your innate rhythm much, but it’s there, eager to come out. Process: When did you learn that you don’t have any rhythm? How do you know that you don’t have rhythm? Is this true? What does it mean to “have rhythm”?
  4. I’m not musical. Pfft. Really? Is that really true? At the most basic level, your cells are gyrating in rhythm right now, creating a symphony of sounds inaudible to the human ear. We are music. Process: Where did you learn that you are not musical? How does it serve you to believe that you are or are not musical?
  5. I haven’t played an instrument since middle school. Okay, well maybe that’s true. . .but most adults have not played an instrument in a structured way since being in school? Process: What was your musical experience like when you were younger? What made it positive or negative? If you could change it now, what would it be like?
  6. It’s going to be loud and chaotic. Strangely enough it is initially loud when you enter in, especially if you are not playing along very loudly. However, most people experience that as soon as they “fall in” to the music, they don’t notice the noise because their focus falls into their experience of playing, exerting, and being in rhythm with everyone else. If you do have sensitive ears, no one will think less of you if you wear ear plugs. Process: How will the sound affect you? Is there a concern you have about the sound? What will your experience be like if you become a part of that sound?
  7. How is that going to help me? You need to go to my post: Music Therapy Fact Sheet. Process: In what ways do you think this experience will be unhelpful? If you were to try this, what new thoughts and experiences will you be having?
  8. That’s for kids. Precisely! Often, it’s been a while since we allowed ourselves to get in touch with our inner child or act child like. This is incredibly liberating! It’s okay to be child-like once in a while. Process: Is it okay for you to act like a child? When was the last time you did something child-like? What will happen if you act like a child?
  9. I’m not in the mood. That’s valid. I have to ask though, when you first start an exercise or healthy eating regimen, are you in the mood? Often, it takes our recognizing the benefits of something to “put us in the mood.” Also, try doing some deep breathing to focus your mind and get you grounded and ready to let yourself have fun with the music. Process: What kind of “mood” do you have to be in to play a musical instrument? What is it you are really thinking?
  10. That looks like fun, but I could never do it, it’s not my thing, it’s way outside of my comfort zone! You are a smart person, you recognize that it looks fun and that it’s outside your comfort zone. You can do it, your limits are in your mind. Now, just think, if you open one door in your comfort zone, just imagine where you might be able to go! Remember, it’s just a door, you can always jump back into your comfort zone. Process: What is scary about going outside your comfort zone? What could happen? Is that really a danger for you?

What do you think, could you join in a music session sometime? Perhaps start out with tapping on your steering wheel on your way to work. Then, maybe try a small instrument, an egg shaker, or something not as scary. . .Work your way up.

We’ll see you at the next Community Music Therapy Event! -dp

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Music Therapy Fact Sheet

Monday, September 13th, 2010

Music Therapy Fact Sheet:

  1. Music has been found to activate the release of mood stabilizing neurotransmitters in the brain, and can therefore lead to mood improvement, relaxation, release of anger, and create a sense of well being (Levitin, 2006).
  2. Engaging in group music making has been found to activate the release of the neurotransmitter responsible for bonding people together (oxytocin), and can therefore assist with social skills (Levitin, 2006). According to Yalom (2005), when individuals in a group feel like they relate to one another, they also feel that their group therapy is more successful.
  3. Learning to play an instrument has been proven to teach self-discipline, listening skills, mindfulness, and improve self-esteem.
  4. Music activates the entire brain. There are few activities that require more of the brain than playing music. This picture shows all the areas in the brain activated when one plays an instrument. For those who are working on trauma, playing an instrument can be very helpful for overcoming symptoms of PTSD and moving information across both hemispheres of the brain. Go here to read more.
  5. Music can be a “safe place” to go, or a “container” in which you can place your troubles. This is considered a form of “externalization.” Allow the music to hold you and/or your troubles.
  6. Playing music is often described as “fun” or “relaxing.”
  7. Music Therapy is not only working through issues, but actively teaching and engaging in techniques for skill building in the areas of positive coping, distress tolerance, self-soothing, anger or mood management, impulse control, positive and/or objective thinking, mindfulness, self-awareness, and self-monitoring.
  8. Music provides for sublimation. This is a fancy word for “acting out” in a positive and constructive way.
  9. Many have said that making music is a great “release.”
  10. If you are uncomfortable in music therapy, this is a perfect opportunity to expand your comfort zone. Whenever you go outside your comfort zone you are opening new door in your brain by creating new neural pathways. Any time we do this we open up the opportunity for some other epiphany to walk in.

Hanser, S. (1999). The New Music Therapist’s Handbook. Berklee Press: Boston, MA.
Levitin, D. (2006). This is Your Brain on Music. Penguin Books LTD: London, England.
Yalom, I. (2005). The theory and practice of group psychotherapy. Basic Books: New York, NY.

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